


to conquer (fear)

by thisissirius



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Misunderstandings, School
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:42:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23843203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisissirius/pseuds/thisissirius
Summary: “Buck is standing right in front of me,” Eddie starts, and then anger swells and he clenches his free hand into a fist. “Did someone actually tell my kid Buck was dead without CHECKING?”day six of chris week: school
Relationships: Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 56
Kudos: 1316
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales





	to conquer (fear)

**Author's Note:**

> i feel EVIL this week lmao.
> 
> but i'll fix it with a TON of fluff tomorrow *kiss*

When Carla drops Chris off he’s looking forward to the day. They have a cool presentation in science class that Bucky helped with and he can’t wait for his friends to see the cool working model of the solar system. Teachers aides help him carry it into the classroom and assure him that’s where it’ll stay until he’s ready. 

Chris makes his way to class. Dad’s picking him up after school - with Buck! - because it’s Diaz movie night, which automatically includes Buck. Chris is trying to convince Dad to make Buck an actual Diaz but he’s not sure he’s all that smart. At least, he’s not picking up on the clues.

Aunt Maddie says it’s because they’re emotionally stunted, but every time Chris asks what that means, she just mutters about idiot boys and their idiot asses. Chris isn’t supposed to say ass, but when he sees Dad and Bucky together he thinks he knows what she means.

There’s a small window of time when the aide comes to make sure he doesn’t get lost in the rush of students and they’re walking towards his next class when she leans down and says, “I’m sorry about your friend, Chris. How are you feeling?”

Chris frowns. “Who?”

“Evan is it? Your dad called. We were told you might be sad today because Evan died last night.”

Chris’ whole world comes to a halt. “Bucky’s dead?”

Chris knows Buck as Buck. He knows Buck’s called Evan because it’s what his dad whispers when they think he’s gone to bed. Buck is Evan. Evan’s dead. Which means Bucky’s dead. He’s not coming over to movie night because he’s dead. He’s not coming over to Abuela’s that weekend because Buck’s dead. Abuela is gonna be sad and cry and Chris— 

Buckys never coming back.

Chris bursts into tears.

“You’re an idiot, Diaz,” Buck says, hip checking Eddie into the locker. “As if I would ever say such a thing to Chris, my best buddy.”

Chim rolls his eyes. “You two are disgusting.”

“Says the guy who constantly needs to cuddle with my sister because she’s — nope actually not gonna repeat that. Too gross.” Buck makes a face.

Eddie laughs, rolling his eyes because it’s his patented ‘Buck is an idiot’ expression, and reaches into his locker for his phone. “Hurry up and get dressed. We have to go to the grocery store for food, otherwise we’re ordering in again and we’re definitely not ordering in again.”

Pouting, Buck let’s out an exaggerated sigh and shrugs. “I’ll ask Chris.”

“No you—” Eddie cuts off as his ringtone fills the room. It’s the school and he’s immediately alert. Chris has barely been at the school a couple of hours so he’s concerned. “Hello?”

“Mr. Diaz? My name’s Trisha and I’m calling on behalf of Christopher. There’s been an incident and we’re worried. Christopher’s extremely upset.”

Buck’s watching him, concern in his expression and Eddie says, “what happened?”

“There was,” a hesitation, “a bit of confusion on behalf of one of the aides and Chris is under the misunderstanding that one of his friends - Buck?- is dead.”

Eddie’s heart stops. He’s fairly sure he blacks out for a moment because Buck’s in his space. 

“Eddie?”

“Buck is standing right in front of me,” Eddie starts, and then anger swells and he clenches his free hand into a fist. “Did someone actually tell my kid Buck was dead without CHECKING?”

The room around Eddie goes quiet. Buck’s face morphs from shock to despair, then settles on anger. “What the fuck?”

“It will be explained,” Trisha starts.

“Someone will be explaining,” Eddie snaps, “when I come and pick up my son. I’ll be there in a half hour. Maybe sooner.”

Hanging up the phone, Eddie knows he’s shaking. The rage in him is barely contained and when he looks up, Buck isn’t faring any better. Chim’s got one hand on his arm while Buck’s yelling.

“I’m right here! Who the fuck gets off on telling a kid I’m dead when I’m right here?”

“Not to play devil’s advocate,” Hen says, and she holds up her hands when Eddie and Buck turn to stare at her. “But you don’t have all the facts just yet. If it’s true — and they did this — then you have every right to be mad. Chris is your priority.”

Eddie blows out a breath. Buck’s still angry, looks like he’s going to start yelling, so Eddie grabs him, looks him in the eye. “Hey. Let’s go get Chris okay? We’ll find out what happened and if they’ve told our boy you’re dead, we’re gonna—”

“Eddie, Chris thinks I’m dead.” Buck sounds devastated.

“I know, Evan,” Eddie says gently. “So we gotta go show him you’re not.”

Buck immediately nods, grabbing a shirt out of his locker. Eddie gives Hen a tight smile. 

“Hey,” she says, “whatever happens, we’ve all got your back.”

“Thanks,” Eddie says. He’s got to go and get his son.

Chris is taken to the counselor. They were trying to get him to talk, kept crouching in front of him and saying things, but Chris curls up on the chair. He knows Dad’s been called and he really needs him to hurry up. He wants Dad to hug him and tell him everything’s going to be okay, even though he knows it won’t.

Chris misses Mom so much and he can’t imagine missing Bucky as much as that. What’s he gonna do now? He loves Dad, but Dad doesn’t know the solar system like Buck. He doesn’t do math with Chris like Buck. Dad doesn’t do the voices when he reads stories to Chris like Buck. 

“Chris?”

There’s the sound of yelling in the hall and then Dad’s bursting into the room, sweeping Chris off the chair and into his arms. Chris bursts into tears again, clinging to Dad’s shoulders.

“I’m here,” Dad says, kissing Chris’ temple.

Chris sobs and looks up to ask his dad what happened to Buck and freezes. “Dad,” he whispers, “I can see Buck.”

“Chris,” Buck says and he sounds sad.

Dad pulls him back, wipes at his face. “He’s alive, mijo. He’s not dead.”

Chris doesn’t understand. He stares at Buck, who’s crying and hovering behind Eddie. “I can touch him?”

Buck makes a noise and then Dad’s shifting Chris to Buck’s arms. Buck is real, he’s whispering in Chris’ ear but Chris isn’t paying attention. 

“You’re alive?”

“Oh Chris,” Buck says, burying his face in Chris’ hair. “It’s me, baby, I promise. I’m right here.”

Buck’s real. He’s alive. Chris sobs, clinging tightly to Buck. Buck’s not dead!

Eddie hands over the truck keys to Buck, who snaps a glare at the counselor and takes off with Chris in his arms. Eddie double checks that Chris’ crutches and bag are in the room, then turns. “Who the hell is telling my son someone’s dead without checking?”

There are a couple of people at the school that Eddie knows well. One of them is the vice principal, who looks apologetic. “Mr. Diaz, I am incredibly sorry. During the staff meeting, everyone was told that one of our students had a family friend die in the night. Unfortunately, she thought the child was Christopher.”

“Why is she saying anything?” Eddie snaps. “How do you get the wrong child?”

“His name is Christopher,” the vice principal explains.

“I don’t care,” Eddie growls. “You already know Christopher’s mother died. Evan Buckley is listed as an emergency contact for Chris and you’ve told me yourself countless times that Chris talks about Buck a lot. I’m pissed off. I understand mistakes happen but this isn’t just a mistake: this is telling my kid that my partner’s dead without checking with me first!”

Eddie informs the school he's going to be taking Christopher home and that he'll be contacting them again, and stalks out of the building. Their truck's still in the parking lot, but Eddie can't see Buck and Chris inside. They're sitting on one of the benches a few feet away, Chris on Buck's lap, and Eddie's heart breaks to see his son still crying. 

"I'm okay, I promise."

"I know," Chris says, touching Buck's face. Buck smiles and Chris brings their heads together for a moment. "I was scared, Buck."

Buck's mouth does a quick downturn. "I know, but I'm right here, okay? I'm sorry the teacher told you I was dead."

Chris tucks his head under Buck's chin. Eddie closes the distance between them, sits next to Buck and wraps an arm around his shoulders. Buck gives Eddie a plaintive look and Eddie wishes he knew what to say. 

"How about we go home?" Eddie says, running his fingers through Buck's hair. He trusts that Buck's got Chris. "We'll make some food, get some movies on, and you and Buck can cuddle on the couch."

"Okay," Chris says quietly. The fact that he's not yelling about how happy he is clues Eddie into his state of mind. 

Buck looks more upset, if that's possible. "I'm sorry."

Chris shrugs. Eddie and Buck exchange a look. They're obviously not getting anything else out of Chris, so Eddie takes the keys. "Come on, let's get home."

Chris can’t let go of Buck.

They’re on the couch, Dad next to the arm, and Chris and Buck next to him. They’ve eaten a lot of food and there’s been a lot of movies, but Chris isn’t really watching. He’s focusing on Buck instead. Hee rests his head on Buck’s chest so he can hear the thump of Buck’s heart. He makes sure to touch Buck because if he blinks, he’s scared Buck won’t be there. Maybe he’s dreaming this, like he used to dream about Mom. 

Buck’s helping; he keeps stroking Chris’ hair, kissing his temple, talking in a low voice. 

Chris is scared; what if he goes to bed and Buck’s not there when he wakes up?

When he asks Dad if he can sleep in the big bed, Dad looks sad. Buck kisses him — and Chris doesn’t think it’s gross this time. “Of course you can, Chris.”

Satisfied, Chris looks up at Buck. “I’d be really sad if you died, Bucky.”

Buck’s breathing goes funny, but then he hugs Chris tight. “I know you would, baby.”

“So would Dad.”

“I would be,” Dad says. “Chris, I promise Buck’s gonna be here when you wake up.”

“Every day?” Chris asks. 

Dad and Buck look at each other for a long time. 

“Chris,” Dad starts.

“Hey,” Buck says instead, shifting so that Chris is between them instead of just clinging to Buck. Dad’s side is warm, and Chris accepts the hug they both give him. “If you’re okay with me being here all the time.”

Chris nods. He thinks maybe he’ll be happier when he’s not scared, but for now he smiles up at Buck. “I’d like it.”

Buck’s smile is a little sad too, and he leans in, kisses Chris and then Dad. “I’d like it too.”

Eddie watches his boys sleep; Chris is curled up between them, dead to the world. Buck’s asleep too, drooling on the pillow, one arm slung over Chris, the other tucked under his arm. Eddie loves them so much he might burst with it. 

Working a 24 hour shift and then helping Chris has left him exhausted, but he can’t sleep. He’s going to have to return to the school and deal with this mess; he doesn’t even know where to begin. He knows Chris is gonna be sad for a couple of days, until he learns that Buck’s not going anywhere. 

Eddie likes the idea of Buck not going anywhere. Ever. 

“Hey.” Buck sounds sleepy. His eyes are half-lidded and his smile’s soft. “Sleep.”

“I will,” Eddie promises, brushing Buck’s hair out of his eyes. He really loves Buck’s hair curly and soft. “You know I love you?”

Buck frowns, but smiles, lifting his hand from Chris to rest it on Eddie’s hip. “Duh.”

Eddie opens his mouth to say _good_ but what comes out is, “I can’t lose you, Evan.”

“Eddie.” Buck sounds sad, and he rubs his fingers under the line of Eddie’s shirt, touching skin. Eddie shivers, curls tighter around Chris and Buck. “You know I can’t promise you won’t ever. I hate that this is happening, but I’m here. I love you, and I’m here.”

Nodding, Eddie leans in, kisses Buck’s temple. “Maybe we could take Chris out tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Buck says, eyes shining and suspiciously wet. Eddie doesn’t mention it. “After the school.”

“Yes,” Eddie snaps. “After the school.”

Buck snorts. “No fight club, Diaz.”

Eddie mock-pouts. “Just one punch?”

“ _No_ ,” Buck says with a gentle laugh, kissing the top of Chris’ head when he shifts. “You can yell to your hearts content.”

Rolling his eyes, Eddie smirks. “I’ll take it.”

With another kiss, this time to Eddie’s mouth, Buck strokes his hand over Eddie’s hip, to the base of his spine. “Sleep, Eddie. We’ll figure everything else out in the morning.”

Eddie doesn’t even care if they don’t; right now, he’s got everything he needs. 


End file.
